12/24/2008 - to China

So my trip to shanghai began with getting business class on seat 11G. This will be my first Christmas away from by mom and brothers since I was about 7 years old. I hope they have a great holiday while I am away. I got to admit that it is a bit strange and I will miss them during these 5 days. This is a change or in way a certain metamorphism of my relationship with my family. This trip may be a start of the changes to come and just a symbol of what will not be the same. Whether that is a positive change or a negative change is uncertain, but if I've learned anything from the past is that it is inevitable. One aspect of this trip is different than the usual would be me meeting my step-dad since he moved to Asia. It is well over 10 years since the last time I saw him. It will be strange because most of my memories are when I was a kid and my perception of him is just but a bunch of past memories. I think about this trip and I realize that it sets up certain disappointments given that one's memories can but disappointment since you can never go back to the past or what it was before. Often what disappoint people are the nostalgia and almost always the attempt to compare the past with the present that lead to sadness. So this led to me to try to prepare myself for it. I have to make a little less of what this is about and not read too much into everything. But that uncertainty also signal me to expect the unexpected and everything should be fine. Maybe that is a little naïve or lack the awareness to be prepared a bit emotionally irresponsible, but isn't it what hope is? Isn't that "Hope" that we as a nation used as a premise to elected our next president? Maybe the current unknown of things are what lead to surprises, disappointments and often a new direction. Whatever it is and however it comes, what is most important for now is that I enjoy getting fat sitting on a 12 hr flight.